Archive

Posts Tagged ‘treliske’

climbing mountains for babies

well not quite literally!

Today we went to visit my new gorgeous niece and her lovely mummy in the postnatal ward. While obviously I was desperate to get to congratulate my sister in law and meet her new babe the thought of being back on that ward made me feel sick. The whole caboodle, parking in that carpark, going up in that lift, waiting in that waiting room, so many memories and many of them aren’t great, but to meet the gorgeous baby certainly a personal mountain worth climbing!

And as with all these things the anticipation was so much worse than the fact. After all the waiting room has all been rearranged and redecorated in the last 6 months, and they were in a totally different room, so much has moved on and changed.

So lovely to have the opportunity to visit the ward, to be there with both my babies and to leave with them both, something I never got the opportunity to do. And fabulous to visit such a gorgeous wee bundle of scrunched features and beautifulness, and a glowing new mum now of 2. Seeing my little brother all proud with his gorgeous new daughter, a doting dad just watching her little face. If I could frame a moment…..It was lovely.

A little victory for me, doing something so ordinary to everyone else. A few more demons slayed and raspberried at.

Welcome to the world Mazey!!

Categories: family Tags: , , , , ,

this time of year

ah yes June is beautiful, the sun is shining, everything is growing like mad, there’s enough sport on tv to keep someone like me on the very edge of sanity for a whole month. This month I’ve had all I can take of football and we’ve not hit the knockouts yet 馃槬 At least that will mean less games….

Anyway, anyway. This time of year creeps up on me, Violet’s birthday and all those memories. I have learned to buy her presents in May when I can be excited about her upcoming festivities and her wheel turning again,聽because聽June always brings all the memories of her arrival.

I have learned that if we must go to Truro in June/July then it is best to take back ways, cos even if I feel fine when I leave the house, I tend to blub all the way there. Whatever distraction I try, still I relive that journey up to day assessment and the end of my pregnancy. And no amount ‘oh but look at your fabulous big girl now!’ changes that.

The sunny mornings make me think of all the sterilising and expressing……the massive amounts of rain we had that year interspersed with hot, humid days…..the dragonfly outside my hospital window……the smells, the uniforms, baby’s crying, sleeping during the day, waking in the middle of the night…….so many little things that can transport me straight back to that week in an instant, just because it’s June again.

first time at the hospital in a whole month!

Which is something of an event in itself, it’s the longest period of time I’ve spent away from Royal Cornwall in at least 8 months!
Today Ivy had her physio appointment, just another follow up, all to do with spending so much time flat on her back in an incubator. Most incubator bound babies get positioned in various weird and wonderful ways at the request of the physios in order to make sure the muscles develop similarly to how they would in the womb, but as Ivy had so many tummy troubles she spent most of her time flat on her back so they could monitor her. Normally she would have spent time on her belly, and time on each side. As a result of this the muscle between her shoulder blades is shorter than it should be, so she brings her hands up to her face upside down, if that makes sense, and doesn’t push off the ground with her hands when on her tummy. Instead she adopts what I think of as a dolphin pose with her arms by her sides raised towards her back. So we have to see a physio now, so as not to cause her problems later on with crawling, and using her hands generally.
It went well, but there are loads of exercises and postions and things we have to do and trying to remember them all is hard! I’ve scribbled them all down and pinned them to a cupboard in the kitchen in the hope we remember.

She’ll be 200 days old tomorrow which is fairly terrifying in itself, I know there seems to be another significant milestone every other week at this age, but each one amazes me! And makes me feel old…..
Anyway I guess while the girls are giving me some peace (which I’m sure is merely temporary) I should be listing more stuff for ebay or creating more things to sell, or maybe trying to find the kitchen under all the mess. But procrastinating is much more fun no?!

cross posted to
www.handprints.org.uk/pixiejo-says.html

would anyone be surprised if I said we’re *still* here?

October 19, 2009 Leave a comment

19/10/2009public171 visits notify me ?

we are. we have not moved anywhere at all yet. 12 days of being packed and ready to drop everything and go. Suppose I can’t really get much sympathy from a load of pregnant women approaching their due dates though haha!!! Well at least one aspect of the last bit of my pregnancy I’m still getting to experience, fabulous.I did ask the nurses what happens next, what happens if a cot doesn’t become available but they were suitably vague, said they’d just keep phoning every day. I’m trying not to worry about it, they seem confident that a cot will appear, but I’m starting to doubt it a little. One must come available at some point I suppose, bah. Trying not to worry about how the wait will affect Ivy, they don’t want to start feeds until her belly has been sorted really, and my poor little chick seems so hungry. Bless her poor poppet! But with each passing day that she’s not being treated, her going home date is going back, yeah I know we don’t have a ‘going home’ date as such, but it’s still going to delay things. So much for aiming for her due date, it seems really unlikely we’ll be home by the 28th its less than 10 days! Boo.

Ivy is still in ICU, though she has ditched her antibiotics now! Hooray! infection 2 cleared, well done poppet! Not really much to say further than that.

Just this interminable bloody waiting! Starting to send me bonkers I think.

pixiejoyou!
Updated 19/10/2009

Aw bless you Karen!!!

Yeah I must admit to being a teency bit jealous of all those lovely ladies getting to take their babies home when 9 and a half weeks in I still have to ask permission to get a cuddle and don’t get to every day 馃槮 Aaah our times will come!!! Waiting sucks!

Jo x

pixiejoyou!
Updated 19/10/2009

So much waiting with these babies!!! Hope the next couple of weeks goes quickly for you Antonella!

Until the babies and the cuddles come, chocolate, lots and lots of chocolate!! No point dieting before Xmas after all!! 馃檪

Jo x

pixiejoyou!
Updated 21 hours ago

Heard today they’re going to start giving Ivy 0.5mil of milk every 6 hours; more of a tease than food really, bless her! But it’s a start at least 馃檪

Antonella, there are crisps if you prefer! 馃槈 hee!

Jo, you’re right it is a long time, haven’t been able to do a proper shop for a fortnight just in case – amazing how buying little bits to last a couple of days costs so much more! I was thinking of just going to Bristol and plonking my big, fat, post pregnancy bottom down the moment anyone moves an inch to bagsy the space for Ivy. But I know that really all the cots are being taken by babies with more urgent problems and I’d feel awful for them if I did that! So indeed fingers crossed for a quick recovery for some gorgeous little mite to go home with their mum!!! 馃榾

Hope you’re all well lovelies xxxx

Jo x


See previous titles

October 14, 2009 Leave a comment

14/10/2009public133 visits notify me ?

Yup we’re still in sunny Cornwall, for the time being.So thought I’d pop up here and say hi!

After all I was saying about giving blood the other day; I had blood taken yesterday by one of the neonatal drs, they did it with a butterfly thing instead of the usual vacuum things the midwives use. Sorry that’s less than clear huh? And for the first time ever I came over all wooshy as it was being done! I’ve never fainted or anything when having blood taken before, even after Violet was born when they took my blood every few hours cos of the pre-eclampsia!! Nuts! Maybe it was the watching it go down the tube…who knows!

Things are tootling along here, still not sure what’s happening re: Bristol. Ivy’s infection markers have come down, everything else seems stable, we got to have a cuddle last night too! They’ve had to put another long line in, poor chick, they had such trouble getting one in her arm, and she had cannulas in both legs at the time, so sh’es had to have it through a vein in her scalp. It sounds much worse than it is to be honest! At least in her scalp she can still swing her arms about, which she seems to enjoy, and she can’t pull on it, which has to be uncomfortable. And if the infection passes, which it looks like it is, then she can go back onto milk and it can come out again.

It’s been a tough week, hopefully we’re past the worst now. Glad that today, so far, there’s not been any phone calls. Of course it’s lovely that our families take an interest in it all, bless them. I try and keep them updated by text and, sadly, by facebook *ahem* and naturally if there was any important news I’d phone them all. But they all phone, inevitably all on the same day, and it’s tiring. I feel like I need to adjust everything I say according to how they’re taking it; when I said to my dad’s wife today that we’re still here, she started gushing about how wonderful news that was, hooray how fabulous, etc. It thoroughly confused me, I don’t know if she picked me up wrong, we are still going to Bristol, just not today….. And when I told gran that Ivy had another infection the other day she came rushing over and hovered at me. It’s tough, I don’t want to worry family unnecessarily, but I don’t want them thinking everything is just shiny either! When Violet was in hospital it was easier to let everyone believe everything was dandy, and largely everything was mainly ok, but I feel I need them to be aware of how much more delicate Ivy is. Even if just to stop them asking me when she’s coming home, which I imagine is as annoying as the questions all you pregnant ladies get ‘when is that baby coming?’ ‘haven’t you had that baby yet?’ I remember my mum getting really annoyed and telling people that in fact yes, the baby was here and she was pregnant again already. And offering people photos to save them staring…..Anyway, doesn’t really work for me. Must think of something witty.

Also I don’t want them thinking all is well cos they keep buying Ivy things, and I find it really hard to take. I’m still scared she’s not here to stay, I can’t imagine bringing her home, every time I start enjoying her something knocks us back. I have a few photos about but everything else gets put away, I don’t want to see these reminders everywhere that my baby isnt with me, even when it’s going well really. It’s lovely that they’re excited about having a new addition to the family, but in many ways I’m trying to treat it like I’m still pregnant, but the fact that she’s not home doesn’t have any impact on them, we have to live in it. I wish they’d give us the space to come to them to tell them things rather than phoning demanding all the time, I don’t have the energy for it. And the recurrence of PMT and the witch does not help any!

Wow that all turned out to be much more miserable than I had intended! Sorry! Ark at me all maudlin, when today actually things are going well. Meh. Must tidy the kitchen and phone up to see how my little chick is getting on, hooray! 馃榾

pixiejoyou!
Updated 14/10/2009

Bless you lovely! I should really only post journals after I’ve visited Ivy, when my sun is shining 馃榾 ((((big hugs)))) Thanks for your lovely message chick!

There’s also an element of excitement to the not being able to imagine her coming home though, if that makes any sense?! I know her coming home is going to change everything about all of our lives unrecognisably and I just can’t imagine it, but I am looking forward to finding out. 馃檪 And yeah in my more maudlin moments like earlier, I can’t imagine her coming home and I don’t want to try and picture it just in case she doesn’t. But I try not to think about it too much, to be honest I couldn’t picture Violet coming home either, and she’s been here for 2 years and now I can’t imagine there ever being a time when she was not here!!

Sometimes it is easier to give people the answer they want to hear when they ask how things are isnt it?! Bless you you’ve not had an easy pregnancy, I’m sure you must be sick to the back teeth of people saying stupid things like ‘oh you’ll be blooming soon’聽 so I’ll refrain 馃檪 Take care lovely xxxx

Jo x

originally posted on babycentre community board; x-posted to www.handprints.org.uk/pixiejos-previous-blogs.html

We’re STILL here.

October 12, 2009 Leave a comment

12/10/2009public219 visits notify me ?

Humpf. There hasn’t been a cot, though in fairness ivy has still been poorly and the consultant didn’t want to transfer her until she’s stable. When I last posted her blood sugar was really high, it then dropped far too low and didn’t recover even after various dextrose top ups, poor chick. Seems to be fine and stable now. It was a urine infection this time, the bacteria bein the most common type to infect premmies apparently so they can narrow down the amount of antibiotics they’re giving her. Still updating for meningitis same as last time, they don’t want to do a lumbar puncture as they’re only just got her clotting sorted, so it’s a just in case at least. She seems perkier and obviously hungry which is good. It took her longer to seem perky last time, so hopefully that is her getting better. Also me and dh have been asked to have blood tests so they can rule stuff out and they wont tell me over the phone what the test is for… Hmmm probably not nearly as exciting as it sounds. Anyway, must get on with cooking tea so we can go visiting. As for bristol, who knows? Wednesday they say, perhaps. Not holding my breath though, question is should I go shopping? Don’t want to buy food that we wont get to eat… Feeling a bit bleh.

pixiejoyou!
Updated 12/10/2009

Ha! Forgot posting from a phone means predictive text! Who knew treating and updating used the same keys? 馃檪

Jo x

pixiejoyou!
Updated 12/10/2009

Just back from our evening visit, doesn’t look like we’ll be off anywhere tomorrow either, they want to make sure ivy is more stable so leaving it until wednesday until they start talking to bristol again. So more waiting certainly. I got to have cuddles tonight which was lovely as its been nearly a week since my last cuddle. It would have been lovely but ivy started taking huge breaths and big twitches, not jittering like a fit but twitches. I got to stroke her head while they took blood, it’s truly amazing how quickly they can run the basic tests, less than 10 minutes, all came back clear. Glad the dr was there though, she was explaining the blood tests we have to have. Something to do with enzymes and blood sugar, to further rule out conditions that may be causing ivy’s prolonged jaundice. They can’t use her blood as too much of its not actually hers currently! So not that exciting. Anyway i’m just typing again. Rambling. Starting to get quite depressed, not sad just numb, so in a way doing this from a phone is quite therapeutic. I can only see 3 lines at a time and can’t over think. Just get it out! So, i’m very sorry if i’m boring you all to pieces with my miserable ramblings on! Meh maybe the david attenborough program will take my mind off it a little.

Jo x

originally posted on babycentre community board; x-posted to www.handprints.org.uk/pixiejos-previous-blogs.html


and the early morning call said

October 10, 2009 Leave a comment

10/10/2009public237 visits notify me ?

she is grumpy! Hurrah!

Ivy woke at 1 and demanded to know why she had not been fed for 12 hours, she’s been sucking on her dummy clearly hoping that sucking harder will produce milk! (yeah I thought dummies were evil too, amazing how a screaming baby changes your mind no?!) She’s looking a lot pinker this morning, which is fab cos she had gone an awful funny colour by the time I left last night….

And when they did the standard Bristol call at 5am (!?!?!) to check for cot availability there was not a cot, but there may well be a cot later. So still potentially go for lift off; so they must be happier with Ivy than they were yesterday!!! She’s on all the antibiotics she was on last time, and also the antibiotics they use to treat NEC even though they’re fairly sure that’s not causing the problem. Which is good cos frankly NEC sounds nasty. I have learned my lesson about googling things, repeatedly unfortunately, but this is one of the more common nasties and so it’s covered in the premmie book I have.

I’m beginning to wonder whether Ivy has in fact read the premmie book too and is using it as some kind of check list ofthings to do before she leaves hospital…..well so long as she doesn’t try and find herself a twin at this point……

THank you all so much for your lovely comments, I really appreciate it! I am honoured, humbled and flattered you all take the time to read and comment. Bless ya all, you are lovely! yuor babys and bumps are very lucky to have mummmys like you guys xxxxx

originally posted on babycentre community board; x-posted to www.handprints.org.uk/pixiejos-previous-blogs.html